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guilty pleasures

magsOne of the guys at work just spotted me in the lift with my weekly handful of gossip magazines and asked if I was across all the Kimye news this week? I had to tell him not to get me started or else we’d probably be standing there for an hour talking about it!

I am a gossip magazine addict. I will also watch E! News on repeat all day and I always tune in to the biography of the week on Bio. What can I say, it’s my guilty pleasure. There’s something about these larger than life famous characters that absolutely fascinates me. I suppose, in a way, I am envious. They have success and wealth, adoration and accolades. These are the basic fundamentals that we all strive to achieve in some way, but they get worldwide recognition for it.

Making today’s gossip news is all things Kardashian. Has Kanye cheated on Kim, is Khloe divorcing Lamar, how did Kourtney lose her baby weight? For some of you this will all be as about as interesting as what your dog ate for breakfast this morning but for those of us who spend our free time devoted to this trivial media, it makes for great reading!

Flicking through the pages of one of my weekly favourites, looking at all the glossy images and made for TV drama headlines, I had to wonder, what is it about our normal day to day lives that drives us to the tabloids? When it comes to getting lost in what Kim Kardashian wore to the gym last week, what am I hoping to escape from?

I’m not inspired by my 9 to 5 job, it’s a good job and I enjoy what I do, but would I rather be writing for a living, working from my home office and keeping my own hours? Heck yes. I have a comfortable life and I don’t have to worry about paying the  bills, but that little girl inside me does still worry about ending up back in the caravan. I have beautiful things, but growing up with nothing materialistic has made owning expensive things mean more to me than most people, and I always want the next best thing.

Don’t get me wrong, I am blessed and I am humble. Every day I find something else in my life that I am grateful for but that will never stop me wanting more. Is that wrong? When we get to a point where our friends, family or the world believe we should just be grateful for what we have, should we stop trying to improve our circumstances? Against all our better instincts, is there a point where we should just settle?

Look at the Kardashians. Regardless of how they got where they are and regardless of your personal opinion of what they do, you have to admire their tenacity and the hard work they do to stay front and centre in the media. Watching their show lets me escape for a moment from day to day life and dream about having all that success and all those beautiful things. Would I want to be so famous I can’t walk down the street, no. Do I want to be so successful I never have to worry about working an uninspiring job or ending up back in the trailer park, YES!

 I’d love to hear your feedback about your guilty pleasures and how you think they enrich your life

 

the secret

Young EbPeople are often surprised when I tell them about my past and how I grew up (yes that is a caravan in the picture and no we weren’t on holiday), it doesn’t seem to match their idea of the person I am today. We had it tough as kids, not as tough as some but tougher than most people I know. I’ve just spent the weekend in my home town and still, when I run in to people from my past, they are always astonished at how well I’ve done and how I managed to get out of the welfare cycle where I was raised (oh yea of little faith!). I must admit though, even I sometimes catch myself and wonder how I did it and how easy it would have been to end up stuck living  the legacy of my upbringing.

Let me share something with you, my entire life I simply believed I could have whatever it was that I really wanted, I was even arrogant about it. Mum never let us think we didn’t have options, and although there was nothing she could do financially to see us on our way in to the world after we left the nest, she gave us the most precious gifts of all, love, faith and trust. She never let us feel embarrassed about where we lived or what we had, but she made darn sure we didn’t settle for it.

Back in 2006 a good friend introduced me to the now very famous DVD, The Secret. It changed my life forever and whenever people ask me for advice or comment on the things I have been able to achieve in my life, I tell them, it’s all because of knowing how to use The Secret. The Secret wrapped up all the things I was ever taught and believed as a child and delivered it in a nice big bow! Karma, faith, hope, love, attraction, visualisation… It was all there!

Do yourself a favour and get a hold of a copy. Invest 90 minutes of your life in watching it and absorbing the message, if you don’t get it straight away, watch it again. Don’t expect to have everything relate to you, just focus on the things you could change in your life right now to make things better.

Watch the first 20 minutes here…

If you’re still a sceptic after all that, just take a look at the little girl in the photo, she sure isn’t living in a caravan anymore!

I’d love to hear feedback once you’ve watched The Secret (or if you already have). What did it make you change in your life, how did it affect you?

f.o.m.o

A girlfriend of mine taught me a new term today, FOMO, have you heard it? It stands for “fear of missing out”.  I thought I’d heard pretty much all the acronyms there were out there (my favourite is one my sister introduced me to, FML, I’m sure you can figure it out) but this one was totally new to me, and it definitely made me think.

Image courtesy of mzuz32 deviantART

Image courtesy of mzuz32 deviantART

I think I suffer from a complete and utter lack of FOMO. While I don’t think we should get ourselves in to situations just because everyone else is doing it, I think everyone needs a little FOMO to get them out in the world, experiencing things maybe they wouldn’t do otherwise.

I find myself at home in front of the TV most Friday and Saturday nights with no desire to get dolled up and join my girlfriends for cocktails at Ivy or dance the night away at Marquee. Part of me feels like I had those nights out in my early twenties, lots of them, and I just can’t be bothered anymore. If I do venture out with the girls on a Friday night I’m the one at the back of the group politely turning down shots and stepping aside so I’m not in the photos, checking my watch every 5 minutes to make sure I don’t miss the last bus home. But then we’ll be out at lunch on Wednesday and everyone is still talking about the amazing night out on the weekend, and I feel the MOR (missing out regrets, I made that one up!). I used to be the first one in the club and the last one on the dance floor at closing time, when did I become satisfied being the boring old married woman?

I started thinking about my FOMO girlfriend. She’s a few years younger than me but has been with her husband for about 7 years and married for nearly 2 (same as me). She’s modest and down to earth, not the life of the party but the girl you want to get stuck talking to if things are on the quiet side.  She’s not the girl to make a grand entrance but once she’s arrived everyone wants to be around her. She’s always at the best restaurants, club openings, premiers and shows. She’s glamorous and fun and every time I talk to her she has plans to attend some other fabulous event!

If this is what FOMO does, I gotta get me some of that!

Is your FOMO getting you out there in the world, or are you stuck at home thinking “FML I always end up with MOR”?

holiday high

holiday high

Photo by M Kalyvas

Aruba, Jamaica, ooh I wanna take ya
Bermuda, Bahama, come on pretty mama
Key Largo, Montego,
Baby why don’t we go…*

Ever notice that when you’re on holiday it’s not just the hang ups about work that you carry around  with you that seem to melt away after your first full body massage, but all your body issues aswell?

My husband and I recently returned from Fiji where we spent 10 amazing, relaxing days and as I unpacked my bags and sorted out all the washing, I couldn’t help but think that most of the cute little shorts, skirts, playsuits and skimpy bikini’s I paraded around in day after day (and felt pretty darn cute in!) will now be packed away until our next beach holiday and my plain old black one piece and all things knee length would replace them for the weekends back in real life. What was it about that Fiji sun that made me care less about my dimply thighs and bloated tummy?

I spoke to my sister who just got back from a short break on the coast and she agreed. She went to put on an outfit from her holiday  and looked in the mirror and was shocked at how it looked, yet on holiday she wore it with pride and felt amazing.

It’s not just hang-ups about clothes either. I always feel sexier on holiday. Gone are the stresses, worries and monotony of day to day work, deadlines and dishes, bills and laundry, the only thing I had to focus on was myself, and my husband (how novel!). I found myself desirable again, in all those skimpy little outfits. I believed it, instead of finding reasons why I shouldn’t and why I didn’t want to let myself.

There’s something about the sun, sand and sea on a beach holiday that really does wash away all that ails you.

Anyone had any success bottling that holiday feeling?!

*Kokomo – The Beach Boys

resolutions

Recently I caught up with 2 of my girlfriends over lunch.  Here you have 3 women whose jobs  are all very different, who have different priorities and ideas and who are at very different stages of their lives. One has  completely upended her life and is making a fresh start this year with no  baggage (you go girl!), the other finished over 10 years of intense study late last year (and made the Dean’s list I might add!) and is looking forward to focussing on herself and her creative passions in 2013, and I’m looking to spread my wings in the world of writing, starting with my blog. It’s very exciting stuff and we were all raring to go 10 days in to the New Year. But it made me wonder, how many other tables of girlfriends were there in the restaurant talking about their New Year’s resolutions, and how many of  us will stick with them? How can I make sure that by March my good intentions haven’t fallen prey to the same old commitments and fears that stole my dreams last year? Continue reading

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