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Posts tagged ‘social media’

little white lie

Belle Gibson has got to be one of the most hated women in Australia right now. Not only did she lie about  having cancer, she defrauded thousands of people and splashed herself all over social media spending the money she claimed to be raising for charity on lavish holidays for her “healing”. It’s not just that she has insulted every person struggling through an illness battle or that she took us all for fools for so long. The most incredulous, infuriating thing Belle Gibson is doing is still lying.

Belle-Gibson-860x450Gibson launched a global business, including a top-rating app and cookbook, off the claims that she was a young mother healing herself naturally from terminal brain cancer.

The thing that annoys me most about this story, other than the fact that it’s become such a big story, giving this disturbed young woman more publicity than she ever deserved, is that she blames it all on a troubled childhood. “As a child, she says her mother changed her name five times for reasons she doesn’t comprehend.” Reports Clair Weaver of The Australian Women’s Weekly.

Gibson isn’t the first person to use their upbringing or mental illness as an excuse for bad behavior. How many sports people have we heard use the terms bi-polar and attention deficit disorder as an excuse to drink and take drunks in the last few years? It’s like a broken record playing over and over.

Stories like Belle Gibson make me angry, not because she lied and continues to lie, it makes me angry because I and many other people survived equally or worse troubled childhoods and didn’t turn out to be lying, manipulative sociopaths.

It’s widely accepted in society that children from broken and abusive homes will have a tougher time maintaining healthy relationships and holding steady employment as they grow up. Let me tell you something. I have had both for the majority of my adult life. I have friends from “healthy” and “normal” families however who are a complete mess! No childhood is an excuse to be a grownup douche bag.

Reading this story over and over today left me wondering, is this a woman a victim of society, or is society a victim of her? Obviously there are no winners in this story. Although she may have been riding the wave of fame and fortune, she has certainly neither in her corner now, and she’s dragging her young son down on the sinking ship with her.

Maybe Gibson isn’t so much a product of a tough upbringing, but a product of her own feelings of desperation and insignificance. A woman who felt so invisible she built herself up by tempting fate and lying about having a terminal illness.

I wouldn’t ever make an excuse for her actions and I think she should be prosecuted for fraud and made to pay back every penny but the woman is obviously unstable and needs help.

Maybe what started as a little white lie should have been seen as a big red flag!

pay it forward

I asked my Facebook followers this week to let me know what they wanted to read about, what was catching their attention in the media or what was bothering them at the moment that they’d like to talk about. Unfortunately I didn’t get a very good response but one that did resonate with me was from a girl named Kristy who said she had been affected by what she saw on the news about troubles in the Ukraine.

We all see stories on the evening news or in the media that disturb us sometimes. I often sit in front of the TV wondering what I can do to help communities in need or countries in crisis. For us as individuals of course the problems are too big, what can we do as ordinary everyday people to change things?

Kristy wanted to write a letter to the government about how Australia could help with what is going on in the Ukraine but she felt that it would be pointless, because what difference would a letter from one person make? My advice was to go ahead and write the letter. Yes, maybe Kristy’s lone voice won’t make a difference but imagine if everyone who had the same idea followed through with it.

Ghandi said, “be the change you want to see in the world”. If everyone who was affected by the trouble in the Ukraine, the war in the Middle East or the crimes against human rights in the Congo put pen to paper, government houses would be flooded with mail and would surely have to take notice.

Kristy’s simple message made me wonder, what sort of world do I want my son to grow up in? What can I do to make a positive change in our community?

giveMy husband and I were having lunch last week at a local café and when he went to pay the bill the cashier told him it had already been taken care of. To this day we don’t know who paid for our meal, although we have our suspicions. Without knowing for sure, we can’t repay that person or thank them properly. All I could do was write a heartfelt thank you on social media hoping they would see it and now we’ve commit to paying it forward.

I know the world’s problems and my free lunch may not seem connected at all but imagine this, if every time someone did something good for you, you paid it forward to someone else. All that means is that you do something good for someone with no expectation of being repaid or even thanked. If everyone carried on paying it forward, we could change the world.

So next time you think you are powerless to make the world a better place, think a little closer to home. Do something nice for a stranger and when they ask how they can repay you simply tell them to pay it forward. Or if someone does something nice for you, make a point of doing something nice for someone else.

We might not be able to change the world on our own but one kind act at a time, we can make it a better place.

facebook fail

Image courtesy of Google

Image courtesy of Google

You’re busted, face it. You told your best friend you were sick and couldn’t meet up on the weekend only to have another friend tag you out at the bar looking anything but sorry for yourself. Caught well and truly red handed in your own lie.

I’ve learnt alot about honesty in my life and I have realised that lies always catch up with you and the truth will always come back to bite you in the butt.

We all have our reasons for telling lies. When I was younger I spun my own fair share of pretty big yarns only to be found out and bullied out of my circle of friends for the crime. I suppose looking back I deserved it, I really told some whoppers!

I was lucky to learn my lesson early on and although like everyone I have been caught in a little white lie from time to time, my friends and colleagues know that I’m a very trustworthy person and I tend to speak the truth, regardless of the consequences and ramifications.

For this reason I deplore being lied to, cheated and messed around. I have no patience for people who want to dance around the truth and be dishonest, even if it’s to save my feelings. You don’t want to meet up on the weekend? Guess what, I’m a big girl, I can take it. Be honest. It’s going to be even more cruel when you get caught out and have to make up another lie to cover up your night out at the club when you were supposed to be in bed with the worst migraine of your life.

Sometimes there’s a fine line between saving someone’s feelings and telling them a bold faced lie. Most of us don’t want to intentionally hurt people so when our workmate asks if our friend would be interested in going on a date with them and we know said friend can’t stand them, we smile and say she’s just really not looking for a relationship right now. Much nicer than telling them what she really said after meeting them at your birthday drinks right?

In the end it comes down to respect and treating people how you’d like to be treated. At the very least, don’t plaster yourself all over social media when the very reason you lied was to hide the fact that you were going out! Remember, once you break trust with someone, it can be very hard to earn it back.

“I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.” Friedrich Nietzsche

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